It’s been eight months since Aubrey Plaza’s husband, filmmaker Jeff Baena, died by suicide, and although the actor has made a few public appearances since, she’s kept her grieving private. Now, as she prepares for the release of her new film, Honey Don’t!, Plaza is publicly opening up about her grief for the first time.

Appearing on an episode of Amy Poehler’s Good Hang podcast, which aired Tuesday, Plaza addressed the loss with her former Parks and Recreation co-star. “You’ve had this terrible, terrible, tragic year,” Poehler said early in the episode. “On behalf of all the people who feel like they know you, and the people who do know you, how are you feeling today?”

“Right in this very, very present moment, I feel happy to be with you,” Plaza, 41, answered. “I’m here and I’m functioning, and I feel really grateful to be moving through the world. I think I’m okay, but it’s a daily struggle, obviously.”

The White Lotus star then likened her experience with grief to the AppleTV+ film The Gorge. “It’s [an] alien movie or something with Miles Teller. In the movie, there’s like a cliff on one side and there’s a cliff on the other side, then there’s a gorge in between, and it’s filled with all these monster people that are trying to get them. And I swear, when I watched it, I was like, ‘That feels like what my grief is like,’” she said.

Plaza and Baena got married in 2021 after 10 years of dating but were reportedly separated at the time of his death.

“At all times, there’s a giant ocean of just awfulness, that’s right there and I can see it,” Plaza continued. “Sometimes, I just want to dive into it and just be in it. Sometimes, I just look at it, and sometimes, I try to get away from it. But it’s always there.”

Poehler ended the episode by encouraging listeners to check out some of Jeff and Aubrey’s work. The couple collaborated frequently throughout their 13-year relationship, releasing Life After Beth, The Little Hours, and Spin Me Round.

Editor’s Note: If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts or self-harming behaviors, call or text 988 to get help from the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

From: Cosmopolitan US
Headshot of Olivia Truffaut-Wong
Olivia Truffaut-Wong
Editor

Olivia Truffaut-Wong is an editor at Cosmopolitan, where she covers beauty, entertainment, and lifestyle. She loves finding and testing the best skincare products to recommend, like the best tinted sunscreens, and is always researching the best cat accessories for her fur baby. She has over 10 years of experience as an entertainment and culture writer and editor, and her work has been featured in The Cut, Refinery29, Teen Vogue, Polygon, Bustle, and more.